And so it begins…
I have sat in this room both literally and figuratively until I can see it finished in my mind. I sit in total quiet and stare until it materializes right in front of my eyes. I have made tweaks here and there by mere inches, changed drawings over and over and traded older ideas for new ones with all the tradesmen that have a part to play in the building. I only get one first impression so it has to count…and it has to stick in the visitor’s mind.
Yesterday, my talented Carpenter Tim and I sat on the floor and made paper patterns. It allowed me to see the exact position and sizes in relationship to the floor space and walls. It also allowed my Electrician George to see where the lighting would need to be placed. Tonight I watched as 2 x 4’s, ladders, drywall and paint were all carried up. Tomorrow, I will be present and accounted for at 6:30 am for the delivery of my new sliding glass doors. Less windows, more walls.
With each check I write, each time I pull my credit card out, my stomach muscles tighten and clench. I no longer sleep at night, what with this worry or that thing I might forget… unless I get up to write it down. Both my Family and Friends have a blind faith in me that I will make this happen and it will be good. I feel tremendous pressure (actual terror on occasion) to not let anyone down, including myself. But each time I meet a new Artist and see that light that come into their eyes and hear the excitement in their voices, I feel something that words cannot express. It’s something I lost a while back, something I’ve been searching desperately to re-gain. If Anuvue doesn’t kill me before I get it open, I will have one heck of a write off this year…and be a very excited, very busy, women…with a dream that came to life.