Archive for the Humor Category

Halloween visitors of 2008

Posted in Bring it, Cool, eclectic, Entering New Territory, excitement, fabulous, Friends, Funny, good grief, Goofballs, Halloween, Hanging out, Humor, Images, Kids in Costumes, neighbors, Oh Yeah!, playing, Portraiture, Smiling, snort, stomach muscles, Stupendous, thanks, the story unfolds, uh oh, wacky, Whoo Hoo, wow on October 23, 2009 by anuvuestudio

Last year my buddy Jimmy over at photo444.com came to the gallery and shot some of the visitors. He posted them on smugmug and each person could order their own copies for a very, very small fee. This year, everyone will be able to sit with an alien and I ask you, who wouldn’t love that! For now…check out these crazies…

A spaceship in the making

Posted in Bring it, create, Entering New Territory, excitement, Halloween, hand of man, Humor, Oh Yeah!, the story unfolds, Uncategorized, wacky, Whoo Hoo on October 12, 2009 by anuvuestudio

It all started with a cardboard tube…yep. Someone at work was tossing it out about 3 months ago and I said “Hey, let me see that”. From there people began to save me tubes. Small, medium, large, gigantic. With that one tube, the idea of a spaceship popped right into my head. I think people are afraid to throw out anything before showing me now 😉

…and from there…well…
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Fluorescent painted tubes are being added to the custom wooden walls and ceiling. The grey walls are trimmed with strips of cardboard to give the appearance of panels. Then each strip has silver tack heads showing to lk like rivets.
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Colored tubes that light up with blacklight…and yes, they all have been mitered! They are first nail gunned with strapping material and then they have connectors added between the areas joined. We cut strips from some foam insulation tubing. It all looks very spacey! I love using things made for something else!
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The “Heavy” ship door made from swapmeet finds. The holes will eventually have fluorescent paint coming through to “light up”.
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Making space rocks starts with chicken wire. This should bring back memories Kathy…
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Bella paper mache’s for the first time.
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and Cody helps with great enthusiasm.
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Marina puts a second coat on the pipes to make sure they really glow.
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Command Central coming along…(some of the aliens are extremely lazy)
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Mike and Mitch (the Brothers Grim) build the entrance.
Look closely and you’ll notice an extra piece of wood holding the arch panels. They made me a template of paper (2’x8′) and said “you can only use 1/2 of the sheet of plywood. Well naturally I used all of it! The circular area cut away made a nice extension at the back. I knew they thought I make one piece, but hey, it was too narrow! Then the pieces were primered in grey and will soon be painted shiny silver.
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halloween 1-90

Characture in caricature

Posted in Art, artists, fabulous, Funny, Goofballs, Hiding place, Humor, Smiling, uh oh on March 12, 2009 by anuvuestudio

Susan (extraordinarily witty and charming) was the first (and only) intern we ever had at the gallery. Now that she’s off and graduated (and can only kill me if she can locate me) I thought it might be cool to show you what our Jamie is currently working on… and Jame…you better keep up when I start running!

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Number Lore

Posted in Attitude, back in business, Bring it, concentration, eclectic, Entering New Territory, entertainment, Funny, gallery, good grief, Humor, Idiot, In sync, it's only money, Land of OZ, Not a clue, Personal, playing the game, snort, the story unfolds, uh oh, Uncategorized, wacky, Whoo Hoo, yikes on January 24, 2009 by anuvuestudio

I have, for the last 5 days, been working on the sales tax for the gallery. Now for those of you that don’t know me, numbers and my brain don’t always coincide. You can ask all the folks at my bank. We’re on a first name basis. Imagine a meteor hitting a small planet at a rather accelerated speed. It’s not that I’ve sold a great deal and there’s a plethora of receipts (not sure what people see in that word). After all…It is art we’re talking here people. But the fact that I’m doing any type of accounting is about the equivalent of me making a pot roast with all the trimmings. It’s quite an unnatural thing.

I feel certain that my accountant ascertained something in me early on that made him come up with an “idiot proof” chart. I’m to fill in “only the little green squares”. I’m to “utilize the drop down menus” and use “only the categories created”. He’s made it “H proof”. It won’t let me type ANYWHERE I’m not supposed to. Ahh, what’s the fun in that? He asked me to send him a small portion of my handiwork to be certain I wasn’t “coloring outside the lines”…screwing up his perfectly executed spread sheet. It even gives me a big red “OK” when I’ve done a good job. Kinda the equivalent of one of those gold stars in elementary school. I sent off my first draft. Sadly…it was for the year 2009 ;(

I did all the requested revisions to round one. I’ve just completed my 4th quarter, sent it off and am eagerly awaiting my grade. It took 6 cups of thick, black, pumpkin spice coffee just to finish. I remember the day when he looked me straight in the eye and asked me if I knew not to keep writing checks if I didn’t have any money in the account. I’m still chuckling over that. I distinctly remember my Father asking my Mother that very same thing! I can say in all honesty, on that one point, I’m pretty clear. I still wish I’d said “That’s when I’m supposed to pull out my credit card, right?…What’s life without messing with the analyticals?

As far as my relationship with numbers goes, I’m not concerned. One of the bank tellers yesterday told me I had wonderful “fashion sense”. The next teller readily agreed and so did the head of business accounts (and he’s a man). So you see…no worries…I already have some form of “sense” down. 😉

Ghastly Mariachi Trumpet

Posted in create, Day of the Dead, Death, eclectic, entertainment, frozen, gallery, Halloween, Haunted, Humor, Images, Music, music makers, Musicians, photography, Skeltons, the story unfolds, Too tough to die, Uncategorized, Whoo Hoo on October 11, 2008 by anuvuestudio

Photography by Photo444

The Doctor Visit

Posted in Choices, Clowns, clutter, comment, Doctor visits, Entering New Territory, entertainment, good grief, Grand Central, Hanging out, Hiding place, Humor, Idiot, Life, neighbors, O.K. Corral, People, Personal, snort, Somewhere Over the rainbow, stomach muscles, the story unfolds, thoughts, uh oh, Uncategorized, Valor, wacky, walking on water, welome, What?, White Walls, Whoo Hoo, wisdom, wow, yellow brick road on August 28, 2008 by anuvuestudio

Ok, I haven’t told a story for a while…and well, today, I’ve got one. First, let me begin to tell you folks out there that still think it’s cool to have a tan, forget it. I spent my entire teen years burning…and peeling, burning and peeling, “repeat at will”… and now I’m paying for it. I now walk around with a giant black Joan Crawford hat and Chinese paper umbrellas; with SP…I don’t know…what are they up to…90? ya know…kind of vampirish.. (Not that I have any problems with vampires) Ok… that said. Preaching over.

Today was my “see the Dermatologist because you’ve had this thing on your cheek forever” visit. I actual refer to it as “My little friend” in a Scarface kind of accent. After securing a parking spot…that isn’t all that easy here in So Cal…I finally made it to room 204. When I opened the door to the office, I was greeted by a “spaciously challenged” room…maybe 9 feet wide by 10 feet long. It held a couch, a table and 4 chairs…2 facing 2 others…all shoved in with a shoehorn. There were no windows unless you call the slider door where the receptionist sits hidden with her own air… a window.

I crammed my way inside and saw a disgruntled looking 20 something guy with his equally disgruntled 20 something girlfriend sitting on the narrow couch. They were probably just mad because they now were forced to share their already limited air supply. Well, I did what any normal person would…I signed in for my 10:30 appointment, glared back and took a seat. The receptionist called me and gave me the ever-popular clipboard. It had more papers to sign than the mortgage I currently have and asked me more personal questions that my own husband has ever dared to ask.

While filling papers out, the narrow entrance door opened and in huddled an elderly lady with a large carved cane. She managed her way to the receptionist sign-in sheet and then took the second of the 4 chairs, opposite me…cane extending far into the room. Still filling out my paperwork, the door opened yet again. In came a long, lanky woman in maybe her late 50’s. She apparently was a repeat customer and had the routine down. She promptly signed and sat in the 3rd of 4 chairs, next to me. I had finished the first draft on my future life story and walked back up. It was at this time I noticed two things. One was that everyone signing in had an appointment at 10:30 and that thankfully there was a candy dish…with tootsie rolls. Well, all things considered, figuring trouble brewing, I naturally dug in, took enough to kill the pain and re-took my seat just in time to see the door open again.

In walked a very round, very tall man…with a rather large, round, pink woman behind him…and just as I thought the room couldn’t get any smaller…in came their daughter with the largest Afro I have ever seen in my life! It was at this very moment I started searching this tiny room for the hidden camera. Each person shuffled around, trying to get comfortable in a room where a family of Hobbits couldn’t get comfortable. I noticed the disgruntled guy get up and hi-tail it out into the hallway as quick as he could. He apparently thought it was “him”…or “her”…and he’d chose to save himself.. We all sat, trying not to stare at each other because there wasn’t anywhere to look…and just when I thought it couldn’t get worse…in walked a woman with a rather large incision at her throat with some very nasty looking sutures. I could feel my head spinning.

She signed, sat and stared with the rest. It was about this time my phone began to ring. It’s rather loud and I tried hard to get to it in time to turn it off. That’s when the elderly lady said “that’s a pretty song’…”who is it?”…all eyes on me. I swallowed and mumbled “Staind”. The late fiftyish woman yelled “Sting?”…. to which I had to reply “No, S-T-A-I-N-D”. “Well it’s very pretty…what’s the title?” she asked. I had to tell her “It’s been a while”…, to which I will not repeat the conversations of confusion that title lead to about my “remembering” but will tell you that Afro kid had a big smirk on her face, waiting to see how I’d get out of it. She and I were the only ones to know that the “Pretty song” was written by a recovered heroine addict confessing his life’s low moments…complete with profanity.

In my silence, the rather large, pink, round woman decided to ask each person his or her reason for being there at this momentous moment in time. I was treated to horrific scars, office treatments, surgery stories, chemo advise and just…just as they got to me…an angel with bright blue eyes and a pixie grin opened the second door and yelled “Heather”. I have never in my life catapulted across a room as if shot from a cannon…but I did then. I kissed her hand and said “THANK GOD YOU CAME FOR ME…!” I think she might have even understood.

I was then settled into a room of quite lovely, Zen like, decor. The designer, no doubt, had at one time been left in the waiting room and felt some form of moral responsibility to those who “made it through” boot camp lobby. I found it interesting that a dermatologist has the same type of bed thing you’re supposed to hop up on. The angel asked me the routine questions, “What are you allergic to”…oh so innocently. My smile confirmed she had hit the jackpot. Upon completion I sat there re-living, in my mind, the stories I had just heard in the Hobbit cave until the Doctor walked in and looked at me over her glasses. She questioned me rather bluntly about “my little friend”…”How long?”….“Um, well, a while”…quite a while”… No eye contact. To which she said “Are we talking years?… Hummmmmm…

She put her rather large glass over me with its rather bright light and pulled and prodded my cheek. She pulled her glasses upright and said “We can go about this one of 2 ways”…”I can give you a topical cream and we can try it for 3 weeks…or we can biopsy now…. which could leave a scar”. Now I knew damn well she thought I’d pick the cream being a woman. I replied, “Well, you know… I’ve always looked kinda innocent…let’s chance the scar!”… And finally, a smile. She then did her thing, finally presenting my cheek with a very un-fashionable band aid that could not be more noticeable if it were hot pink and I left with a “thank you very much” getting the hell out. I actually ran the 3 steps I needed to pass the waiting room.

I returned to work and promptly told the boys I was happy to have Shaved off” a little weight and that I had now provided them with a target for all those rubber bands. My first comment, from a friend was…”Oh, Nice look”… I expected no less…

When I got home I promptly went to the store in search of the “cool band aids”. I had a choice of “Nascar” or “Hello Kitttie”…neither of which suits me. I was looking for a scull with crossbones but selected “Hello Kittie” because I figure I can draw fangs on her…

And, when I return to the Doc’s office, I think I’ll get some use out of my old lawn chair and sit in the hallway until they call… 😉

Crazy Cameras

Posted in Cameras, Collections, creative, design, eclectic, fabulous, Hobby, Humor, Images, photography, Stupendous, Uncategorized, Unusual, vintage, wacky, Whoo Hoo on June 21, 2008 by anuvuestudio

I saw a cool camera collection at the Eastman House where Charlie the Tuna was displayed. While hunting for a good photo to show you, I found one man’s amazing collection of plastic cameras. Moshe Ber-el…that’s one great collection buddy!

CHARLIE TUNA camera, USA by WhiteHouse
This camera is shaped like the STARKIST TUNA figure. It uses 126 cartridge film and a flash cube can be attached to Carlie’s head.

MICK-A-MATIC, USA, 1970s
A 110 camera in a Mickey Mouse head. Flash cube on top of head and the lens is in the nose.

KOOKIE KAMERA, IDEAL Toy Corp. USA, 1968
A great novelty, toy with a real camera! (Propably the best collectible novelty-camera). Takes 1 3/4″ x 1 3/4″ photos on direct positive paper, includes an in-camera processing (see the photo bellow).
Comes with disguises for the kids and has a special effect extra lens (The tomato soup…)

Back view: notice the view finder and at the bottom the black developing tank (plastic). A inner cutter is moved from side to side in order to cut the photo-paper thus the already photographed paper falls into the tank.

Can cameras: A promotion camera made in the actual size of the can

The film is advanced by turning the silver cap of the can

Box cameras: Promotion camera made in the actual size of a Cigarette pack


And the same design & size to resemble a fruit juice drink box

AERIAL KITE CAMERA (TOY), USA 1999
Assemble kit: built a camera housing for a single use camera (included). You’ll have 2 strings one attached to your kite and the second attached to your camera’s shutter release so you can take a photo from up in the sky. If to want to take another photo you’ll have to bring down your kite.

VOLTRON – STAR SHOOTER, MACAU, 1985
The Voltron figure closes (transforms) into a 35mm SLR camera, while it has a real 110 camera at the top.

Hanna Barberra
1978 – Fred Finstone & Yoggi Bear, 126-film

Bugs Bunny Made by Helm, 126-film

POTENZA tire camera, JAPAN 1950s
This camera is shaped like a Bridgestone tire. Uses 110 cartridge film. Single speed shutter.

Dog Walking

Posted in Clowns, Dogs, Goofballs, Hanging out, Humor, Images, Life, performance art, photography, Random, uh oh, Uncategorized, wacky on May 13, 2008 by anuvuestudio

Taking Notice

Posted in Art, baby blue, back in business, bullet holes, concentration, Director, future, gallery, Humor, Images, Land of OZ, old endings, Personal, photography, seldom is heard, signage, vision, What?, yuck! on March 30, 2008 by anuvuestudio

I have been wracking my brain (well, what there is left of it) to find a way to make Anuvue Studio’s new Gallery more noticible from the street. The tenants below me (although gracious and lovely people) have a “less that wonderful” sign (which I would gladly torch, steal, hide or shoot bullet holes into) (just kidding) (not really kidding) attached to my balcony…yes, it’s the only place he/she can actually hang a sign. It has been so since 1972…and who am I to re-invent the world.

So, I thought above this “Less than wonderful” sign, on the equally less than lovely wrought iron in “Baby Blue” (the first color I think of for wrought iron) …I would hang my nice new sign…with lighting…to blast both the blue iron and ug-sign to OZ. Sorry Toto. BTW, I hated those flying monkeys too.

Above my sign, I have 10 windows…and although these windows would be partially blocked (by my sign), if I picked just the right combo of photos that have most of the image on top…I could even enhance the sign with photographics, drawing the eye up…and maybe everything else would disappear…like my money. Hey, it could happen…

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Some photos courtesy (stolen rather) from Photo444 😉

Things in the attic

Posted in create, eclectic, Hanging out, Hiding place, Humor, Images, mannequins, photography, playing, seldom is heard, uh oh, Unusual on February 17, 2008 by anuvuestudio

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